If you look at my personal Facebook page you will find that I tend to live anywhere from Maryland to France. I tend to change where I live and where I am from every few months or so. I also never refer to my husband or my children by their real names and I have every protective block I know how to put up on my account.
You may think that this seems a little bit extreme and you may be right. Oh I also never “check in” anywhere and I will not be giving a play by play if and when I go on vacation. I do have what I think to be very good reasons for why I do what I do. The main reason is that I’m scared of crazy town. My mother was married to a crazy person for fifteen years and when I got married I couldn’t put in the paper where we would live and I didn’t put it in the paper when I had children. The reason is crazy town. My mother’s husband lived there and he may have been the leader. He has long since passed away but I know there are more like him in the world and I will do everything I can to protect my family.
I don’t state where I went to school and I don’t put where I really live because I don’t want to be found. The people that I’m friends with know where to find me. They know where I live. They also know who I am referring to when I refer to my husband and my children. I don’t have to spell it out for them.
I don’t “check in” because I don’t think anyone needs to know where I am and I am not going to update you while I’m on vacation because I don’t want to get robbed. As far as I’m concerned nothing says “please rob me” like announcing on the internet that you are on vacation. I’m not going to post pictures of the beach when I’m at the beach so you know how far away I am from my house. That’s asking for a personalized visit from crazy town.
I’m a writer. I have a vivid imagination to be sure, but also I have people who think they know me because they have read what I have allowed them to read about my life. The reason I know this is because I have authors I read and I too feel as though I know them and that we are friends. I don’t know them and we are not friends. This was confirmed when I went to another author’s book signing in June. She told a story of one of her readers showing up at her house. They had found her and thought they could show up there unannounced and uninvited. This only confirmed my fears and solidified the ideas of protection that I had set in place. Stating that I live in the Midwest gives me a few states as a cushion. Moving anywhere that sounds interesting that day will serve only to confuse those who don’t know and entertain those who do.
So I move around mostly to ease my mind. I understand that it may seem odd or even ridiculous. For me though as I look at my children and the life we have together I know there isn’t anything I wouldn’t do to protect them. I am greatly blessed by my readers, those known and those unknown, but I don’t want you coming for a visit unless I invite you or you call first.
To the authors that I love to read and sometimes I think I know; I get it. I am not going to hunt you down to visit and be best friends. I’d like to be best friends but I’m not going to show up unannounced at your house. That’s just creepy. You can just come visit me...if you can find me. Just don’t forget to call first.