Monday, November 3, 2008

Top Ten Reasons I Hate Vegas!

I hate Las Vegas!!! I believe it is the crack in the rear of all humanity. Nothing good comes out of there if ya know what I mean. My husband just returned from a "boys weekend" in the city of all things sinful. He went to go and win the answers to all our financial woes. He brought home nothing more than more financial woes. In a city that never sleeps. Where you cannot walk down the street without being slapped in the face with pornography and more ways to lose your money than one can count. I wonder why people keep going. Statistically the chances of going and winning big are slim to none. I'm not one to spend money I don't have on the off shoot of winning more. So without further ado here are my Top Ten Reasons I Hate Vegas:
1. It is hot!
2. It is dirty.
3. People hand you pornography as you walk down the street.
4. My husband didn't win.
5. The nickle slots don't either exist and if they do they don't give back nickles.
6. Sales tax is 7.5%
7. A room at the Bellagio is upward of $200-$300 a night.
8. A ticket to see a headliner is upwards of $200 a ticket.
9. Every casino has the same games.
10. Again my husband didn't win.

If anyone knows the how to either shut this place down or how to actually win with less than $100 in your pocket and come home a millionaire. Please let me know. I will suffer the through the pure and utter disdain I have for this pit of moral inhumanity and lay my $100 down on the table win my million and come home. Otherwise we need to start telling all our husbands like we tell our children when we don't want to either go or want them to go "I'm sorry it's closed today!" Or "I'm sorry it went out of business they closed Las Vegas they decided they were rich enough and the masses needed to pull themselves out of the pit of poverty and quit dreaming their dreams of getting rich quick!"

Thank you and good night!