My heart hurts. I'm sitting in the student center at my daughter's college where I'm supposed to be working on my (self appointed) comeback. Writing the book that might be...the end of the trilogy. I'm not sure why there needs to be a third or why it should end with three, maybe that is how I'm convincing myself to do it. To go through the struggle of finding the words again. I'm distracted however, watching all of these college kids coming in and out, eating food that doesn't seem like breakfast food for 8:15 in the morning. Some are plugged in just as I am, looking at their phones or laptops or notes. I wonder if they are listening to a Danny Gokey station on Pandora like I am. Somehow I doubt it.
None of these are the reason for my heart hurting though. A young girl who I worked with was found killed yesterday morning along with her young son and my heart just aches. She was eighteen and had her whole life in front of her. I look at these kids and again I'm struck by how senseless her death is. Yesterday I think I was just in shock, unable to reconcile the information, refusing to understand that it was true. A fireman while on his way to work happened to look in the direction of her apartment and notice there was a fire. He called for back up and soon there was an investigation underway. She had injuries to her body inconsistent with the fire.
In the short time that I knew this young girl, I knew her to be a quiet, soft spoken girl. She was beautiful and her smile was full of joy, especially when asked about her young son. Her face would light up a thousand suns and she would joyfully tell you all about him. She was very bright and caught onto things much quicker than I have. I often would ask her for help with something that I wasn't sure about or didn't know how to do. She was always willing to help. She, though radiant, didn't seem to want to draw attention to herself. She was nervous to use the intercom. We would try to get her to step out of her shell some, though she would make comments on occasion that were just so uncharacteristically funny and surprise us. Honestly, because she was so quiet and we were often so busy and concentrating on our work I don't know much else about her other than that she was one of many children in her family. It seems like so little to know about someone and yet in the nine months that I knew her we often didn't work the same shifts. Although, how much do we really know about each other anyway?
Today I read where they arrested the young man who had been her child's father and had at one time been in a relationship with her although from the comments it seems they were no longer in a relationship. He is twenty years old. He is charged with two counts of murder and one count of arson. If convicted on all counts he faces a lifetime in prison and possibly the death penalty. I also read that he stabbed her and cut her throat before setting fire to the apartment. This bit of information just adds to the horror of it all.
I'm so sad that this has happened. Two young lives have been taken and one life is essentially over. All the hopes and dreams and potential just squashed and I can't reconcile how this could happen. How this young man makes the decision to do something like this. How anyone could look at a life and see no value.
Two families are affected by this and the overwhelming sadness and loss and heartbreak they must be experiencing right now makes me hurt for them. People I have never met and yet they are my family and your family too. Brothers and sisters in Christ, fellow journeymen on this blue and green ball called Earth that we are all just trying to venture through together. Children of God who were created by God but who live in a fallen, broken world. Psalm34:18 says, The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. I pray that they are leaning on the Lord during this time. I hope they have that hope that they will see her and her son again one day in glory. Could you pray with me? Could you pray for all those who are hurt and broken and suffering because of this? Could you pray for peace? Could you pray for this messed up broken world that we live in? We need to be there for each other. We're called to love each other. We're called to love like Jesus. Every life has value. Every single life. Each man, woman, and child was born into this world as a beautiful creation and gift from God and somewhere along the way we've just gotten so lost. We've lost sight of the One who holds everything together. I'm praying, will you join me? Rest in peace sweet ones.