Mow the Yard, Maybe

I really love the song Call Me Maybe.  I feel better about that fact now that I know that I am not actually old enough to be the artist’s mother.  (Thanks to Wikipedia)  The song’s lyrics don’t really apply to me, so I thought it would be fun to try a rewrite of the catchy hit.  This way it applies to my life and makes a little bit more sense for me to sing it.  I also added a few notes and rewrites of my rewrites for your amusement.

Mow the Yard, Maybe

I threw a ball and it fell                       (Of course it fell, have you seen me throw a ball?)   

Where it landed I can’t tell                  (Tall grass?  Nearsightedness?  Combination?)

I looked to my kid as it fell                  (He should have been watching)

And now it’s in my way                       (Kind of like the swings on the swing set)

I might find it in a ditch                         (Which wouldn’t be so bad because I’m scared to mow the ditch.)

With small toys and trash scattered amiss      (What?)

I didn’t want to look for this                        (You got that right!)

But now it’s in my way

The ball’s bounce wasn’t holdin                  (Hello, I’m Heather and I’m not sporty.)

The tall grass is all that’s showin                  (Good news!  No dandelions!)

Hot day wind was blowin                           (It was dusty) 

Where do you think it went don’t be lazy      (Get over here and help me!)

Hey it rained this morning and this is crazy   (Is it?  Is it really?)

But I’ll get my mower and mow already        (You are welcome neighborhood watch dogs.)

It’s hard to look right at my yard I’ve been lazy        (Nearsighted, remember?)      

But I’ll get my mower and mow it maybe            (I wonder if we have gas?)

Hey it rained this morning and this is crazy

But here’s my mower, so mow the yard maybe      (You volunteered right?)

And all the other neighbors mowed already          (Of course they did.  Overachievers!)

So I’ll get my mower and mow maybe                (I’ll do it myself.)

You took your time helping to find the ball          (Slow poke)

It took no time to mow at all                          (I was singing and dancing so it was fun.)

You gave me no help at all                 (Was it my singing or the dancing that deterred you?)

So still it’s in my way                               (I’ll just mow around it.)

My skin got sun burned and pealed            (Aloe please?)

In the sun and the pain is real                         (Ouch!)

I didn’t know I would feel it                          (I’m quick)

But now the pain is in my way                       (Again aloe?)

The ball’s bounce wasn’t holdin                     (yeah yeah)

The tall grass is all that’s showin

Hot day wind was blowin

Where do you think it went I’ve been so lazy?

Hey it rained this morning and this is crazy

But I’ll get my mower and mow already

It’s hard to look right at my yard I’ve been so lazy

But I’ll get my mower and mow it maybe

Hey it rained this morning and this is crazy

But here’s my mower, so mow the yard maybe

And all the other neighbors mowed already

So I’ll get my mower and mow maybe

Before I mowed my yard                               Before I mowed my yard

The grass was so tall                                       It looked so bad

The grass was so tall                                       It looked so bad

The grass was so so tall                                   It looked so so bad

Before I mowed my yard                               Before I mowed my yard

The grass was so tall                                       It looked so bad

And you should know that                             And you should know that

It was so so tall                                               It looked so so bad

Tall tall tall                                                      Bad, bad, bad

It’s hard to look right at my yard I’ve been so lazy

But here’s my mower, so mow the yard maybe

Hey it rained this morning and this is crazy

But I’ll get my mower and mow already

And all the other neighbors mowed already

So I’ll get my mower and mow maybe

Before I mowed my yard

The grass was so tall

The grass was so tall

The grass was so so tall

Before I mowed my yard

The grass was so tall

And you should know that

So mow my yard, maybe

So much fun to write, I would like to insert that this week we mowed first.  We felt like rock stars for an entire four hours.  Then the neighbors came home and went to work on their yards.  Those four hours were AWESOME!  We celebrated our small victory with ice cream.